Borat's Guide To English Gentlemen
(Borat standing inside a
beautiful shopping arcade.)
Borat - Check with,
Jagshemash. Hello, I like you. Everybody say, "Mad Dog and English Gentleman go dance in the midnight sun". That's why I come to England to find out what make English Gentleman, English Gentleman. Check with.
(Borat introduces himself to a well spoken
elderly man in a Tailor Shop)
Borat - Hello
Tailor - Borat, how are you?
Borat - Very nice to see you.
Borat - If man come in here with many bodyguard, rich, with beautiful lady with
(mumbled) shaved pussy, with gold, you will serve him?
Tailor - Yes, oh yes.
(In the following scene the Tailor is measuring Borat for a pair of suit pants - the Tailor measures his outside leg and then reaches for Borat's belt of his
Borat - (Hesitant) What are you doing?
Tailor - Measuring your leg. (He then proceeds to move the tape measure to the inside of Borat's
Borat - (Pushing his hands away) What do you do?
Tailor - Measuring your leg.
Borat - (Pulls away) You try to touch... eh...
(gestures to his groin).
Tailor - I don't try to do anything all I do is try to measure your leg.
Borat - (Goes close to the Tailor and whispers in his ear) You are not a... homosexual?
Tailor - What? - Sorry?
Borat - You're not a...
Tailor - (Flustered) I don't think so. You better ask my wife.
Borat - OK - I'm sorry I'm sorry - I thought you... touch my...
Tailor - No problem no problem.
Borat - No problem. Please you can touch!
Borat - To be English Gentleman I need English Lady. This why I meet Mrs
Heskell who teach me how to flirt. So I can do a sex with English girl.
(Cuts to Borat sitting next to Mrs Heskell, an attractive plumpish woman, in a room)
Borat - Who come to learn to flirt?
Mrs Heskell - Well, people like you. (She touches his arm and giggles. Borat smiles back and
Mrs Heskell - You see, I just had to do that (she
touches his arm) and you went flirty!
Borat - Yes I like!
Mrs Heskell - You see when you meet someone - you look around them and pick something you can compliment them on. So if you look at me now, think about something you like about me and just... say...
Borat - Errrrrr... You have nice tits!
(Mrs Heskell bursts out laughing)
Borat - But why you laugh? Tits? (Borat gestures to his
Mrs Heskell - Tits? I have nice... Is that the kind of compliment you would give to somebody?
Mrs Heskell - Flirting is a prelude to meeting somebody.
Borat - What is prelude?
Mrs Heskell - It is a beginning. It is a way you can meet someone and decide whether you want to spend more time with them.
Borat - After how many minutes can I say, "Hello do you want to do with the sex please?"
|(Note: The Unoffical Borat
Site has since interviewed Mrs Heskell - she gives a very intresting
insight into how Sacha sets up these interviews and how it is all played
out - click here to read it). To visit Peta's
Website click here.
(Borat meets Peter Stringfellow (famous English nightclub owner with reputation of 'liking the ladies'))
Borat - Hello Borat.
Stringfellow - Hello nice to meet you.
Borat - Very nice to meet you.
Borat - You have a Gentleman Club?
Stringfellow - Yes. Now. The idea of my Gentleman's Club has a different connotation.
Borat - In Kazakhstan we have a club (Borat indicates to a badge on his lapel)
where you go, and have other men, they come with friends, they watch, they talk, they do business, they watch a porno, with a man and a woman, we see one with a shaven pussy. Very exciting to see... Is something to see...
(Stringfellow falls about laughing) Why you laugh? Why you laugh?
(more seriously) You laugh at me? I'm a twit?
(Peter Stringfellow takes Borat to see his jacuzzi)
Borat - This?
Stringfellow - Jacuzzi.
Borat - It... (indicates bubbles coming from the side)
Stringfellow - That's right.
Borat - It is a fantastic. And what is.. you have with girl?
Stringfellow - Of course.
Borat - What is most number of people you have?
Stringfellow - Four is comfortable. Six is a crowd.
Borat - Now I go to see English Club.
(Borat introduces himself to the secretary of this particular English Club. A bald chap maybe in his
Mike - I'm Mike Evans. The club secretary of the club.
Borat - Hello.
Mike - This is the library.
Borat - It's very beautiful room.
Borat - Do you ever throw out member?
Mike - It has been know to happen. Yes.
Borat - If a man get very... drink... And do a dirt... (Borat indicates to his
Mike - Oh no, we wouldn't like that at all.
Borat - You throw out?
Mike - Yes.
Borat - And what if a man wants to make love to a man's bottom?
Mike - We certainly don't approve of that at all.
Borat - We think he is wrong. Maybe he is...
Mike - We do as well. Homosexuality is certainly not encouraged in the club.
Borat - So Gentleman is not homosexual?
Mike - Definitely not.
(Borat is then introduced to a large middle aged chap)
Borat - And you have been to Stringfellows?
Gentleman - No
Borat - It is fun because you have the woman with the big... how you say?
Mike - (Mike joins in from off shot) Mammory glands. Mammory glands is the word you are looking for.
Gentleman - Or breasts.
Borat - Breasts, breasts, like errr... tits?
Gentleman - Tits, not a Gentleman's word.
Borat - They have girl there - stands like this (Borat indicates a girl standing with large
Mike - I'm sure you have them in Kazakhstan as well.
Borat - We have... but they (Borat indicates his imaginary breasts drooping
Gentleman - Well you mustn't wrestle them so much - clearly you have made them drop.
Borat - But the Tazakh girl is very big.
Mike - So you like those?
Borat - But the Tazakh... with tiny tiny tiny (Borat indicates to his
Mike - We say horses for courses!
Borat - No we do not do it with horses.
Mike - No it is...
Borat - We do not like with the...
Gentleman - No it is an expression. It means some people like one sort of thing some people like another. English idiom.
Borat - People who like animals to make love is a sick!
Mike - Very sick.
Gentleman - It's not what he meant.